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Official Singles Chart Top 100

22 March 2024 - 28 March 2024

The Official UK Singles Chart reflects the UK’s biggest songs of the week, based on audio and video streams, downloads, CDs and vinyl, compiled by the Official Charts Company. The UK Top 40 is broadcast on BBC Radio 1 and MTV, the Top 100 is published exclusively on OfficialCharts.com. View the biggest songs of 2023.

 

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Y

YoCheese

1

Sorry for being late here's my top 10 this week:


1 Hot in itTiesto, Charli XCX
2 (It goes like) NananaPeggy Gou
3 Doctor (Work it out)Miley Cyrus, Pharrell Williams
4 Paint The Town RedDoja Cat
5 PoisonHazbin Hotel 
6 HeII's Greatest DadHazbin Hotel 
7 RespectlessHazbin Hotel 
8 InsaneBlack Gryph0n, Baasik
9 Loser, BabyHazbin Hotel 
10 Out For LoveHazbin Hotel 
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danielcordell

-3

It had a few ones sneak in there but I did the real this weeks Top 40 for fun using all of last weeks separates and none of these tracks actually won their chart numbers at all when doing a straight real chart stats shootout to their respected official positions between the official separates at all as half of the actual real frontrunners are banned from appearing due to age Crazy Frog's 20th Birthday as the original ringtone before they thought it was a good idea to have the track being slapped on a disk the year after even made it when there is no banned tracks or dodgy division maths just straight separates official stats shootouts involved.


40:

YOU'RE WELCOME
DWAYNE JOHNSON 1.7B

39:

SHALLOW
LADY GAGA & BRADLEY COOPER 2.3B

38:

THE REAL SLIM SHADY
EMINEM 1.3M

37:

R U MINE
ARCTIC MONKEYS 523M

36:

CAN'T HOLD US
MACKLEMORE/RYAN LEWIS/DALTON 2.1B

35:

ONE KISS
CALVIN HARRIS & DUA LIPA 1.4B

34:

WAKE ME UP
AVICII 3.4B

33:

FAINT
LINKIN PARK 576M

32:

Miley Cyrus
Flowers 1.4B

31:

I AM YOUR GUMMY BEAR
GUMMY BEAR 3.8B

30:

LAST CHRISTMAS/EVERYTHING SHE WANTS
WHAM 1.2B

29:

SOMETHING JUST LIKE THIS
CHAINSMOKERS & COLDPLAY 3.1B

28:

LET HER GO
PASSENGER 4.5B

27:

ANOTHER LOVE
TOM ODELL 1.8B

26:

SOMEONE YOU LOVED
LEWIS CAPALDI 2.6B

25:

Anti-Hero
Taylor Swift 400M

24:

BLINDING LIGHTS
WEEKND 2.9B

23:

BATH SONG
COCOMELON 7.3B

22:

AMERICAN IDIOT
GREEN DAY 423M

21:

SAVE YOUR TEARS
WEEKND 2.1B

20:

WE WILL ROCK YOU
QUEEN 897M

19:

WE FOUND LOVE
RIHANNA FT CALVIN HARRIS 1.5B

18:

AXEL F
CRAZY FROG 5B

17:

WELCOME TO THE JUNGLE
GUNS N' ROSES 795M

16:

BACK IN BLACK
AC/DC 1.3B

15:

I WANNA BE YOURS
ARCTIC MONKEYS 719M

14:

PARADISE CITY
GUNS N' ROSES 968M

13:

DO I WANNA KNOW
ARCTIC MONKEYS 2.2B

12:

SOMEONE LIKE YOU
ADELE 2.7B

11:

YOU GIVE LOVE A BAD NAME
BON JOVI 614M

10:

ANOTHER ONE BITES THE DUST
QUEEN 926M

9:

BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY
QUEEN 2.5B

8:

Rema
Calm Down 2B

7:

NUMB
LINKIN PARK 2.8B


6:

THUNDERSTRUCK
AC/DC 1.9B

5:

DON'T STOP ME NOW
QUEEN 1.2B

4:

SWEET CHILD O' MINE
GUNS N' ROSES 2.4B

3:

THE SOUND OF SILENCE
DISTURBED 1.2B

2:

LIVIN' ON A PRAYER
BON JOVI 1.5B

1:

IRIS
GOO GOO DOLLS 1.1B


That's what my count ended up being to each number in straight separates shootouts for the spots and each track just kept it's spot no rubbish like flipping the order around again to have the novelty records 1 and 2 but keeping it OCC orders.


So the old tracks are the actual ones performing the best there is no doubt thats probably why none of them oldies are appearing as numbers on the main one as it would be quote on quote dominated by oldies if they went completely taking out dodgy divisions for digital in their counts and adding straight numbers into each other and stopped banning their performing oldies outside of christmas or a film to make it completely the legit all current charting tracks counted by OCC with all additions no divisions in the maths chart so it's the 100% correct figures used as well.


Maybe if polarizing tracks which got a different entry for different separates like Prada was counted on a points based system to the separates that would probably be number one and even made it but I went straight shootout using rolling current for the time of the count stats for the tracks.


Prada was the only track which had positions all the way across the map of the 40 including even one number one I think which would give it 100 points on the points system version if I had done that for my Easter Special mess around but it only scored 80M on the stats numbers so didn't get a number in this format.


Maybe doing it the points system way would have been more accurate for the tracks Kantar wants to count towards their chart actually standing a chance against Kantar separates exclusive tracks they barred from it as it would give every track a fair whack on performance and appearances across the board but I wanted to do the count this way maybe as Easter starts on Friday and ends at the bank holiday it means there is technically 2 chart weeks for an easter special to contend maybe it would be fun to do one on points as well to predict what would happen a few hours later in the future as the would probably go towards new on the points battleground. lol.

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Shoogle

1

I have absolutely no idea what any of that meant.

Y

YoCheese

0

Same

G

Giovanni

0

my top 20 (24.3.2024.)

1. (2) BILLY JOEL – turn the lights back on

2. (3) KINGS OF LEON – Mustang

3. (1) MAHMOOD – tuta gold (2weeks at No.1)

4. (5) DIPLO & SHARAM ft PONY – anthem

5. (4) ANNALISA – sinceramente (3weeks at No.1)

6. (9) UNDERWORLD ft KETTAMA – fen violet

7. (10) NORAH JONES – staring at the wall

8. (6) CHARLI XCX – von dutch

9. (8) NICK CAVE & THE BAD SEEDS – wild God

10. (27) GUSGUS ft EARTH & HÖGNI – breaking down


11. (11) TOM NOVY – closer

12. (34) THE LIBERTINES – oh

13. (7) KASABIAN – call

14. (12) DUCK SAUCE ft FUZZY CUFFLINXXX – clap your feet

15. (20) HAUSKEY – bad juju (baby)

16. (18) WARPAINT – common blue

17. (33) TWO DOOR CINEMA CLUB – happy customers

18. (21) ALFIE TEMPLEMAN – eyes wide shut

19. (14) CALVIN HARRIS ft RAG 'N' BONE MAN – lovers in a past life

20. (36) STRFKR – holding on

............new songs at chart (top 45)............

34. NEW – FLIGHT FACILITIES ft OWL EYES – trouble

37. NEW – ROSE VILLAIN – click boom!

38. NEW – TWO SHELL ft FKA TWIGS – talk to me

39. NEW – PAUL WELLER – soul wandering

41. NEW – EMPRESS OF – Lorelei

43. NEW – BRIGHT LIGHT BRIGHT LIGHT ft ULTRA NATE – every emotion

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faiyaz

0

even though beautiful things isn't my fav (at all.) it's fun to see movement at the top for once, just hope it doesn't stay for another 6 weeks

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itsnoodleszn_

-1

yeah movement is always nice, or else i’d be getting sick of that beyonce song before long 

H

haruu

1

Hey!! This is my first comment here. I've been on the charts since 2020 (4 years now!!) and I decided to introduce myself!!


First of all, I am 15M, My name is Haruto (call me Haru for short) and my English name is, unfortunately, Joseph (don't call me that please)


I love listening to the All About Lily Chou-Chou soundtrack, and my profile picture is a character from the show, proves I'm obsessed haha.


My favourite artists are The Smiths, Artic Monkeys, Radiohead, BABYMETAL, HANABIE, , Wave To Earth, TV Girl, Faye Webster, Lana Del Ray, CHANMINA, Lamp, Melanie Martinez, Beabadoobee and xdinary heroes, what about you? I probably forgot some haha.


I don't like being involved in drama so please be nice to me.🙃


That's all, hope you can welcome me <33

H

haruu

0

It won't let me change my profile picture haha

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faiyaz

1

bea, lana, tv girl and faye webster in the favourite artists is reallll

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itsnoodleszn_

0

i LOVE the smiths, radiohead, arctic monkeys, tv girl, faye webster, lana del rey, melanie martinez and beabadoobee. your taste is awesome 🔥

btw, regarding pfps, you gotta make sure it’s the correct file. .jpg, .jpeg and .png are supported by occ, but not .webp. hope this clears things up

M

Midlands

1

Congratulations Benson well deserved number 1.

And contrary to what some people think he's not a one hit wonder, this is his third hit.

M

maciedeclines

1

chart re-ranking

Great
1) Escapism.
2) Never Be Alone
3) Worth It.
4) exes
5) greedy
6) Prada
7) Nothing Matters
8) Murder On The Dancefloor
9) yes, and?
10) Cruel Summer
11) Unwritten
12) TEXAS HOLD ‘EM
13) Training Season
14) Never Lose Me
15) we can’t be friends (wait for your love) ⬆️
16) Whatever
17) What Was I Made For?

Good
18) bye
19) Saturn
20) Homesick
21) Austin
22) Alibi
23) Lose Control
24) End Of Beginning
25) Scared To Start ⬆️
26) Beautiful Things
27) Praise Jah In The Moonlight
28) redrum

Decent:
29) Kitchen Stove
30) act ii: date @ 8
31) Stick Season
32) Evergreen
33) Going Home
34) Birds In The Sky

Meh
35) Whatever She Wants 
36) Lil Boo Thang

Bad
37) FRI(END)S

Awful
38) Lovers In A Past Life
39) Home

Haven’t Heard
40) CARNIVAL

M

maciedeclines

0

- we can’t be friends (wait for your love) was also upgraded  in score from a 9 to a 10.

- Alibi was upgraded in score from an 8 to a 9.

- End Of Beginning was also upgradedin score from an 8 to a 9.

- Scared To Start was also upgraded in score from a 7 to an 8.

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itsnoodleszn_

2

my music takeaway tonight!

  • well done to benson for the number 1, it’s just a shame i’m not a fan of the song at all. i kinda wanna like it but his vocals grate on me. regardless i hope he’s happy
  • i knew the guitar heroes tune would crash as it was purely backed by sales, but im happy it’s here because this means david gilmour gets another chart hit to his name (huge fan of pink floyd here and have my wish you were here vinyl playing rn)
  • a warm welcome back to never lose me following the remix and flo milli’s new album! oh, and birds in the sky is also back. ugh. why couldn’t we get jungle’s classy tune back instead?
  • as a swiftie, acr was due for cruel summer someday. i love that song, but to quote another song of hers, it’s time to go. yg marley got hit very soon though.
  • KING KENDRICK IS BACK ‼️‼️‼️ his verse on like that is sure to start a civil war in hip hop and i’m all for it. bring it on.
  • finally, yves tumor. i said it.

have a great weekend yall~ <3

M

maciedeclines

1

I was listening in and Benson’s reaction was actually really sweet, he’s quite humble. But yes I’m very glad to see Never Lose Me back, and yeah Back On 74 deserved to make it 😩

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Piran

1

Agreed on nearly every point, I think. Hope you have a good weekend too! 😊

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itsnoodleszn_

3

yeah even though i dislike the song i admire benson’s humility. its a good thing to have

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faiyaz

1

now... i love kendrick but look he did not need to randomly diss like that icl

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Piran

3

My Top 10 Songs Of The Week:

#1: Dylan Conrique – Last One To Love Me (debut)   [New No.1!] 🇺🇸

#2: Ariana Grande – Supernatural (-1) 🇺🇸

#3: Dylan – The Alibi (=) 🇬🇧 (🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿)

#4: John Summit & Hayla – Shiver (+2) 🇺🇸 / 🇬🇧 (🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿)

#5: FLETCHER – Eras Of Us (+3) 🇺🇸

#6: Nina Nesbitt – Pages (-4) 🇬🇧 (🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿)

#7: Charli XCX – Von Dutch (-2) 🇬🇧 (🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿)

#8: Charlotte Plank – Rage (+5) 🇬🇧 (🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿)

#9: The Blessed Madonna ft Clementine Douglas – Happier (+14) 🇺🇸

#10: Annalisa – Sinceramente (+15) 🇮🇹

Full chart on Crown Note: https://www.crownnote.com/charts/piran/pirans-top-50-214

Full chart on BuzzJack: www.buzzjack.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=270165

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Piran

1

For Olivia, it's Yves Tumor. For Macie... RAYE, Becky or Tate. My current obsession? Dylan Conrique, who claims her sixth #1 single in less than 10 months! 

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itsnoodleszn_

1

yup, our current obsessions do have an impact on our charts… haha. great song from dylan though!

M

maciedeclines

1

well my obsession might also be Dylan Conrique at the minute 😳

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Piran

1

Excited to see how well her songs hold up for you in the upcoming chart! 

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Piran

1

I'm curious to see how many of his songs will stick around. 

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itsnoodleszn_

2

yves tumor absolutely NUKES my personal charts! 💣


  1. meteora blues - yves tumor
  2. god is a circle - yves tumor
  3. summer - good kid
  4. dream palette - yves tumor
  5. karma - taylor swift
  6. strawberry privilege - yves tumor
  7. parody - yves tumor
  8. romanticist - yves tumor
  9. smoke signals - phoebe bridgers
  10. dead girl in the pool - girl in red
  11. radio - freak slug
  12. lovely sewer - yves tumor
  13. gospel for a new century - yves tumor
  14. heaven surrounds us like a hood - yves tumor
  15. taking what’s not yours - tv girl
  16. drifting - good kid
  17. lost - bring me the horizon
  18. in spite of war - yves tumor
  19. identity trade - yves tumor
  20. kerosene! - yves tumor
  21. operator - yves tumor
  22. i guess - lizzy mcalpine
  23. neé-nah - 21 savage, travis scott & metro boomin
  24. theatre - etta marcus
  25. super stars - yves tumor


=======================================


top 10 albums:


  1. praise a lord who chews but which does not consume; (or simply, hot between worlds) - yves tumor
  2. heaven to a tortured mind - yves tumor
  3. american dream - 21 savage
  4. stranger in the alps - phoebe bridgers
  5. let’s start here. - lil yachty
  6. boy anonymous - paris texas
  7. deeper well - kacey musgraves
  8. prelude to ecstasy - the last dinner party
  9. the land is inhospitable and so are we - mitski
  10. lahai - sampha


yeah i’d call myself obsessed lol

M

maciedeclines

1

oh wow that’s a huge album bomb 👀 good to see Karma back too!!

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itsnoodleszn_

1

it was over two albums and it was a case of me REALLY getting into them. i’m getting their most recent on vinyl for my birthday too. as for karma, it got a high replay factor out of nowhere and it’s such a fun song

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Piran

3

Aww… no tracks from Kacey Musgraves ended up charting, but pleased that she did incredibly well in the albums chart having landed a Top 3 debut there.

Would definitely recommend checking more of her stuff out if you’re a fan of country music. Between this and ‘I Remember Everything’, she’s easily one of the best female artists currently working in the genre! 😊

M

maciedeclines

2

My top 10 of the week!


01 01 Becky Hill & Sonny Fodera - Never Be Alone 1 (x5) 09

75 02 RAYE ft Mahalia - Five Star Hotels. 2 36

NE 03 Charlotte Haining - Sinner 3 01

20 04 Ella Eyre ft Tiggs Da Author - Head In The Ground 4 02

NE 05 Dylan Conrique - last one to love me 5 01

05 06 RAYE ft 070 Shake - Escapism. 1 (x4) 58

NE 07 INJI - HATE YOUR GUTS 7 01

68 08 Tate McRae - guilty conscience 3 15

03 09 Tate McRae - exes 1 (x1) 19

22 10 cassö, RAYE & D-Block Europe - Prada 1 (x1) 32


Full top 50: http://www.buzzjack.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=270166

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Piran

1

Charlotte Haining and Dylan Conrique! ❤️


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itsnoodleszn_

1

nice to see five star hotels take that huge leap and last one to love me debut 👀 

M

maciedeclines

1

Five Star Hotels. would’ve actually gone number 1 if Becky hadn’t announced her new single 😳 but yeah Dylan’s contending for #1 with two songs so far for this tracking week and that’s one of them! 👀

A

Alfie

0

Review Thing Now.


SO CAN THESE LOT GET A KNIGHTHOOD YET? TIER:

The Last Dinner Party - Nothing Matters [35] (Massive contender for Song of 2024. Unless anyone else have something to say about it, of course.)

Beyoncé - TEXAS HOLD 'EM [3]

Natasha Bedingfield - Unwritten [12] (Will she ever make the Top 10?)

WHOOPEE FOR MODERN MUSIC TIER:

Noah Kahan ft. Sam Fender - Homesick [37]

RAYE - Worth It [33]

Sophie Ellis-Bextor - Murder On The Dancefloor [36]

YG Marley - Praise Jah In The Moonlight [39] (why. why is this is on ACR now.)

IT'S GOOD OR WHATEVER... TIER:

Taylor Swift - Cruel Summer [31] (ABOUT TIME.)

RAYE ft. 070 Shake - Escapism. [24] (The fact it spent ages on the chart is why it keeps dropping on my personal chart.)

Ariana Grande - yes, and? [7]

Noah Kahan - Stick Season [6]

I....... THINK IT'S OK? TIER:

21 Savage - redrum [29]

Flo Milli - Never Lose Me [23] (I prefer the original)

SZA - Saturn [21]

CHARIDEE TIER:

Mark Knopfler's Guitar Heroes - Going Home (Theme From Local Hero) [18] (I never really cared for Dire Straits, ok?)

A RETURN TO OK-NESS TIER:

Djo - End Of Beginning [5]

Kanye West/Ty Dolla $ign - CARNIVAL [8]

Tate McRae - greedy [28]

Dua Lipa - Training Season [9]

Ariana Grande - we can't be friends (wait for your love) [2]

UMMMMM...... I DON'T GET THE HYPE TIER:

4batz ft. Drake - act ii: date @ 8 [22]

Calvin Harris & Rag'n'Bone Man - Lovers In A Past Life [14]

Ariana Grande - bye [20]

Dasha - Austin [15] (Country music just ain't my shizzle.)

Pozer - Kitchen Stove [30]

Billie Eilish - What Was I Made For? [19]

Richy Mitch & The Coal Miners - Evergreen [38]

IS IT OK TO SAY I'M NOT A FAN OF THESE? TIER:

Tate McRae - exes [27]

cassö/RAYE/D-Block Europe - Prada [25]

Ella Henderson ft. Rudimental - Alibi [11]

V - FRI(END)S [13]

Becky Hill & Sonny Fodera - Never Be Alone [32]

WOW. THIS IS GARBAGE TIER:

Good Neighbours - Home [26]

Bryson Tiller - Whatever She Wants [16]

Michael Marcagi - Scared To Start [10]

IF I EVER HAVE TO TALK ABOUT THESE LOT AGAIN TIER:

Paul Russell - Lil Boo Thang [40]

NewEra - Birds In The Sky [34] (No one wanted this back. Not a single person.)

Benson Boone - Beautiful Things [1] (At least it can't go any higher.)

Kygo & Ava Max - Whatever [17]

Teddy Swims - Lose Control [4]

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itsnoodleszn_

2

spot on with the comments about newera and the last dinner party. i don’t mind a bit of dire straits but i was always more of a pink floyd girl. and i prefer the lil yachty remix of never lose me personally

M

maciedeclines

0

yeah Nothing Matters at #1 is incredibly based, also for me in terms of never lose me versions: OG > SZA & Cardi > Lil Yachty

A

Alfie

0

Chart Review 22/03/24

guys i'm not happy.

Welcome to the annual musical hoodwinking that goes on every 7 years, where I type these words while jiving to artists you've never heard of like 'Idlewild' and 'Plan B' (except people actually know who he is), and make snide comments about folk that are all better than me in the musical department. This week gives me the opportunity to act more cynical than usual, as a whopping TWO new entries can be found amongst the best-sellers, and they're both worthy enough for me to waste one or two paragraphs over them. Even though they matter as much to the Top 40 nowadays as Vera Lynn and Winifred Atwell.

There are two re-entrants this week, so I might as well get them out the way. First up, I regret to inform you that the awful Birds In The Sky by NewEra has returned after a couple weeks out at 34, and it still sounds as bad as modern EDM gets nowadays. Apparently there's a new remix of this tune out now that features fellow (hopefully) 1-hit wonder Mazza_l20, he of surprise Top 20 hit Murdaside (which I forgot to talk about in recent times), and who's been barred off Radio 1 on the basis that he's been incarcerated as of recent times. Look, NewEra, whatever goodwill you're trying to do for the music industry keeps going horribly wrong. You don't wanna end up busking for money like 90% of your chart rivals will be by 2040, do you? Anyways, Never Lose Me by Flo Milli jumps back in as well at 23, helped by A) her new album arriving online, and B) a new version with SZA and Cardi B pretending to care about someone who sounds eerily like the two of 'em. Who knew Attack Of The Clones was so influential, eh?

Anyways, there's a new No.1 this week.

And not a very good one.

You see, I have this thing written on my brain's checklist, stating that if you're gonna top the chart, you'll need to actually have proof that you can make quality music. Of course, it never stopped ultimate 1-hit wonders 3 of a Kind in 2004, but even the worst of the worst have made 1 or 2 songs that get my interest. This is the point where 21 year-old Washington native Benson Boone needs to up his game. 'Cause he's top of the charts now.

As we all know by now, I hate Beautiful Things, mainly because it stupidly chooses to imitate Sam Ryder's ouevre (is that how you spell it?) and yell over the chorus like he just stood on LEGO. Even for a rock-loving, Marilyn Manson-serenading guy like me, this is just too much to handle. The likes of Lewis Capaldi specialise in this technique, and it's a trick that poor old Benson has been quick to cash in on. Having said that, I never really thought he'd be No.1 material. Until now of course, as he deposes Beyoncé after 4 weeks of playing second/third fiddle. As you can probably tell, I am distraught, and am planning a nuclear strike on his current location as we speak, but if he can get to No.1 after several weeks, then it's clear to see that something about it works. Unfortunately, I just can't tell what it is. And I'm far from the only one to cry wolf about this. Still though, well done Benson I guess, and good luck trying to follow it up. I mean, you can't do any worse than Kenya Grace, can you? The only thing I can add to this is, why is he posing with his award like there's a shotgun pointed at him offscreen? Mate, it's just BBC One's The One Show, it's not like you're on Squid Game or anything.

Beyoncé thus falls to 3, usurped in the battle for the runner-up spot by Ariana Grande, and the album track that's gonna end up far bigger than she thought. we can't be friends (wait for your love) should've been No.1 instead, but then again, it's a pretty low bar to clear. And given Teddy Swims is back in the Top 5, I would rather that bar be raised a lot higher. Props to Ariana, though, for holding on to her No.1 album spot, becoming the first LP since Taylor Swift's 1989 (TV) to spend consecutive weeks at the summit. Small mercies for Kacey Musgraves then, who sees her new album go in at 3, while Justin Timberlake goes in at 5 with his new one. Selfish, though, hasn't returned to the Top 40. So yeah, no, he's done out. As Smash Hits famously quoted, it's safe to say he's down the dumper.

It's also a sad moment to say that the limp and fragile Scared To Start by Michael Marcagi has crawled into the Top 10 now, and that sound you can hear while it plays is the groan of a 17 year-old crying into his pillows, at the sight of how down bad the music scene is nowadays. I feel like a middle-aged dad at this point, which doesn't bode well for the future. I mean, could you imagine me by the time we get to the 2030s? You can't, can you. I'll have given up by then. 🏳️

There are two new hits today, as I've already said, and both couldn't be further apart in relations to each other if they joined NASA and piloted to Mars. In at 13 in the latest in a long, long (oh my gosh, it's so long) line of solo BTS projects that I routinely diss every time they make a chart impact. In this case, it's the second appearance of forgotten man 'V' to the UK Top 40, after September's 1-week wonder Slow Dancing. And what a surprise, it's boring and homogenous. Clearly the most interesting thing about it is the title, FRI(END)S, given the song has already fallen out of my memory banks as I'm typing this. It does debut 11 places higher than his last effort, so I guess that's a positive. Even though it just isn't. Like, at all.

As for No.18, um... I had no clue this was gonna do so well. For those who don't know, Mark Knopfler was the lead singer of everyone's favourite 80s dad band Dire Straits, who had huge success with that Brothers In Arms album, along with smash hits like Money For Nothing and Sultans Of Swing. In 1983, Mark felt like sticking a song called Going Home out, as part of the soundtrack for Local Hero. It stiffed, peaking at 56, even though it plays every single time Newcastle United kick-off nowadays. For some reason, Mark felt it was a good idea to get as many guitar legends as possible to record a new version, which is alright, I guess. What nobody expected was the fact it was No.1 in the midweeks, before casually sinking away in a fashion that would impress Liam Gallagher, but does at least enter at 18. Of course, you'll need to seek this one out for yourself, given it's nearly 10 minutes long, and you're just hearing a bunch of guitar noodling that sounds not unlike that most dreaded of music genres, PROG ROCK. A list of everyone I know will be in my P.S. section at the end. Either way, it's his first Top 40 appearance since Boom, Like That hit 34 in 2004 and I for one will be amazed if it stays in the Top 100 next week. Might as well hope for the best, in this current climate.

Narrowly missing out are Jungle at 41 which, I mean, it's fine, it's already been in the Top 40, I don't really care if it misses out. Rudimental go up to 43 so at least you know who to keep track of next time out, Dimitri Vegas's Dido refurbishment has climbed to 50, Jax Jones has rocketed up to my dismay, Meghan Trainor's back at 60, Cardi B's new one flops at 85, ZAYN continues to ruin his chart ambitions at 89, and some guy called Mark Ambor debuts at 94. Just a shame that he sounds like generic countryside fluff then.

Going into the charts next week include Bryson Tiller's new one, Benson Boone's new one, Kenya Grace's new one (sensing a pattern yet?), Hozier's new one, and O-Rod's new one, while the album charts will involve afrobeats princess Tyla, Mancunian elder statesmen Elbow, and Future and Metro Boomin feeling like it's a good idea to do some collab album or whatever. And I'll be here to inform you of all the goings-on. Although, it's not like you'll care about any of them. BYE!!!



(P.S. The Mark Knopfler charity song includes Joan Armatrading, Jeff Beck, Eric Clapton, Paul Carrack, Sheryl Crow, Roger Daltrey, Sam Fender, David Gilmour, Joan Jett, Hank Marvin, Brian May, Tom Morello, Nile Rodgers, Mike Rutherford, Slash, Bruce Springsteen, Ringo Starr, Sting, Andy Taylor, Pete Townshend, Keith Urban, Ronnie Wood, and Zucchero. And a bunch of other people I haven't heard of.)

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itsnoodleszn_

0

“why is he posing with his award like there's a shotgun pointed at him offscreen? Mate, it's just BBC One's The One Show, it's not like you're on Squid Game or anything.”

PHAHAHA


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Piran

6

Oh dear… we now have a third song in the bottom tier and nearly a quarter of the list is in red.

Hoping for ‘Green & Gold’ and ‘Never Be Lonely’ to enter the region next week, along with some tracks from the deluxe edition of ‘GUTS’!

Top 40 (Birthday!) Rankings: https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/9d59b6727be21702af3a336cf1bbd6086997126a904e4a812538bdd1329ba29a.png

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maciedeclines

2

Happy early birthday!!!!

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Piran

2

Thank you! ❤️

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Alfie

2

Happy 🅱️irthday! I hope you've enjoyed it!


(sorry if that emoji was uncalled for)

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Piran

1

No worries! It's not actually until Tuesday, but this'll be the Top 40 on the day itself, so yeah. Thank you anyway! 😊

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itsnoodleszn_

2

happy early birthday! ^-^

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Piran

1

Thank you, Liv! 🧡

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Piran

5

Even if I love ‘Cruel Summer’, it was definitely long overdue an ACR hit and I’m surprised it managed to avoid it for as long as it did.

Disappointed that ‘Praise Jah In The Moonlight’ got placed on it this early though. :/

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Piran

4

I knew it would fall a lot from the First Look and midweek update, but I still didn’t expect Mark Knopfler’s charity single to still be in the Top 20 for the final chart.

Anyway, I have a ton of respect for it given that all the sales for this are going to support teenage cancer charities in the UK and the US. I really hope they get the donations they need because this is such an important cause!

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Piran

3

The frustrating thing about ‘Beautiful Things’ is that I think the verses are actually okay, but the shouting over the hook just completely kills the entire song for me.

Congratulations to Benson Boone on his first #1 hit, but I really hope this doesn’t stay there for long or I could see it grating on me even more.